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Monday, March 28, 2016

Ted Cruz, the GOP's Barack Obama but with better looking women......

At the beginning of this 2016 Presidential Election cycle, almost every single political pundit and pine tree nitwit that has cable tv, said “Donald Trump will implode”.  It happened in July, in August, in September, in October, in November and so on.  The only thing imploding are news media organizations, political hack’s credentials, the ratings of all “anti-Trump” outlets and now, the Cruz Campaign.
Ted Cruz, the JUNIOR Texas Senator from the great State of Texas, took to his Facebook page.  Apparently due to his #SUPERHIGHIQ it’s quite difficult for the “average sap” to really ‘grasp’ the reality of what is happening within the context of his words, so we’re here to translate for you.  :)
“I want to be crystal clear;”
Okay, there we go!  The first paused sentence out of the gate can be translated as follows:  Ted Cruz couldn’t be crystal clear if his ass was stuck inside a light bulb!  What he was really referencing is a hot new lead on a chick he had an affair with.  We’re investigating #CrystalClear right now.  I bet she’s in D.C. and probably in politics.
“These smears are completely false, they’re offensive to Heidi and me, they’re offensive to our daughters, and they’re offensive to everyone Donald continues to personally attack.”
Wow!  Now there’s a Texas mouthful for ya!  Let’s break it down into “little not so smart folk terms” shall we.  “These smears are completely false. << SHOULD HAVE BEEN A . @TEDCRUZ not a , Mr. Lawyer Boy… “They’re offensive to Heidi and Me”  ???  HELLO EINSTEIN- Didn’t they teach you GRAMMAR in that fancy law school you went to or possibly some of the high and mighty elitist circle parties you have attended over your LENGTHY political career?  How about “They’re offensive to Heidi and I.”  <<< There ya go buttercup.
The last bit of this post is so hypocritical, I will just jot my thoughts about it.
Ted, you are the most deceptive, deceitful, dishonest, unethical and snarky little weasel that I think I’ve ever seen run for President and possibly ever even seen at all.  Your condescending tone to “dumb folks” and “Trumpsters” and “Liberals” that do not see your way forward or agree with your ethics, bold stances or issue solutions, is just pathetic… much like what your campaign is turning into.
People wondered when the #bromance of Donald Trump and Ted Cruz would be over.  Well, it’s not only been over for quite awhile, it’s gotten to the point of ridiculous and it’s time that Ted Cruz just mans up.  Don’t be a Jared Fogle, Ted.  Don’t be a John Edwards, Ted.  Don’t be Jesse Jackson, Ted.  Don’t be Tiger Woods, Ted.
In closing, I would also like to encourage you to stop pawning Christian values and release those demons of despair, corruption, dishonesty and loathing.  Touting your strong Christian beliefs and your strong Faith is only damaging the Christianity community, much like ISIS is damaging the Islamic community.  So please go raise your hands and squeal your bluster in a closet, where you wish that this story would have stayed… for eternity.